I now gave my mind to philosophy: the great object of my ambition
was to make out a complete system of the universe, including
and comprehending all things. Instead of countenance, encouragement, and
applause, which I should have received from everyone who has dignity of
an oyster at heart, I was exposed to calumny and misrepresentation.
While engaged in my great work on the universe, some even went to far as
to accuse me of infidelity; -- such is the malignity of oysters.
-- Autobiography of an Oyster, deciphered by the aid of
photography in the shell of a philosopher of that race, recently
scalloped.
(Attributed to Charles Babbage)
